Secrets
The Most Important Thing to Teach Children about Secrets is that SECRETS ABOUT TOUCHING ARE NEVER OK!
Sexual Abusers Count on a Child's Silence!!! (Learn more)
Help children to understand there is a difference between secrets and surprises.
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A surprise is fun and happy, and is ALWAYS shared when the time is right.
Use these examples: surprise parties and gifts.
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Secrets can be unsafe and cause fear and worry.
For example, a child gets a cut from a broken glass but keeps it a secret to avoid getting in trouble for breaking the glass. A grown-up needs to know so the injury can be cared for.
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The intent of a secret is to hide the truth indefinitely.
The babysitter or older sibling has her boyfriend over while you aren't home and asks a young child to keep it a secret to avoid possible consequences.
Sexual Abusers want to hide the truth FOREVER!
It is important to set a good example about secrets. Don't ask your child to keep a secret, even if it seems harmless. This could be confusing in other situations and put your child in danger.
While older children and adults can understand that a secret is not necessarily "bad", younger children need a clear definition to help them understand when to tell a grown up about a secret.